fuckyeahrandombeauty: happythings: (via...

Saturday, August 28, 2010

happythings:

(via awhitestraw)

A list of a few of the things I have found while cleaning my room:

my wireless mouse, which apparently does work after all, and what I thought was a problem with it was really just a battery issue
my camera-battery charger, missing since I left for college two years ago
a knitting needle wrapped in packing tape, also functions as a Harry Potter wand
stacks of CDs and yellowing playbills: remnants of old obsessions
bug-eyed blue sunglasses with horribly scratched lenses; I thought they were really cool when I was about fifteen
a floppy-disk labeled “Jarade! the Movie/Little Scott of Horrors”
so many photos taken between roughly the years 2001 and 2004
Really, Susan, eventually you are going to have to throw away this stuff from high school. You almost threw away the notes you made working on your Portrait—you shouldn’t have looked at them so closely. You were never happy with the way it came out, anyway. Getting rid of your precalc notebook from Mr. C’s class is a start, though. Into the recycling pile.

It’s a little silly, in some ways, to begin this project now, when I’ve been living in this room for over two months and only have about three weeks left before I leave. But I’m sick of living in this mess of a space that I didn’t even put together myself—in fact, that’s why it’s such a mess, because when my sister moved into my old room, my mom just threw everything in here. It upset me but it seemed too much work for too little gain to rearrange things. But I’ve had enough, and I’m going to do this now, make it what I want. Finally.

The secondary reason I’m doing this, or it might be the primary, I’m not quite sure, is in preparation, sort of. I want to get rid of things (see the final bullet point above). I want to streamline even as I continue to accumulate, because there’s no reason I should have so much crap here, especially now that I’m halfway through college. It’s still my room, for now, even if I don’t spend most of my time here. But in two years I am going to graduate and get the fuck out of Chicago, though God knows where I will go, and then I will be officially moved out of my parent’s house. And I don’t want to have a room full of so much unused or useless stuff left behind. So, as I said, I’m streamlining. Starting the moving-out process a couple of years early, I suppose you can think about it, to make it easier on myself. Why do I still have notebooks from middle school? Because Mr. G’s class meant a lot to me. But should I keep them indefinitely? Absolutely not.

The dust that this process has churned up is kicking my allergies into high gear. It’s not pleasant, but I’m suffering through. It makes me feel so much better already that I’ve switched the CDs into the less-visible shelving and the books out onto the wall shelf above my bed. It makes more sense; it’s more mine (more me?).